Ha Giang loop pt. 2

We were off driving through the streets, blissfully ignorant of the toll that some of this trip would take on us. No one on our tour had ever made this trip, so this was a fresh experience for all of us. Leaving Ha Giang City was pleasant. There was a slight overcast but enjoyable, with a nice break from the usual Vietnam heat. We had large open roads with few drivers on the road. Just beyond the buildings that line the street are mountains covered by the bright green Vietnam jungle.

With the trip leaving the city being very short in only a few minutes, we found ourselves leaving the town where we were riding around the base of the mountain that was so prominently on display from the road. Now with a teal-colored river on the other side of the road, and immediately felt like the air was suddenly crisp. About 30 minutes into our first portion of the ride, we stopped for a quick break to let everyone stretch their legs, rehydrate and grab some pictures of the scenery while not being on the motorbikes.

The break was short, and the tour guides changed some seating to pair the riders with the drivers better. Then we were off again. I have to say I feel a break that quickly into our ride gave us a false sense of hope that there would be many breaks and an easy ride. As we continued through the mountains, we left the river for some gradual altitude changes and another 30-minute ride before we got to the first stop that seems to be made by every group going on the Ha Giang loop tour. Hundreds of motorbikes filled the side of the road, and at least one rider for each.

There was an apparent reason why this was a stop, and it was because this was the first of many breathtaking views you would get to see on this ride.

It was at this stop that I had to ask the tour guide when we would get the chance to the toilet. Vâng had assured me that there would be a toilet soon. Usually, I wouldn’t inform you about my need for a restroom break, but this becomes a frequent thing as the ride goes on. We get back on the bikes and go through another small town, and immediately start heading up one of the mountains. The roads on the mountain twist and turn with steep inclines. I suddenly learned how little power the motorbike I was on had. My motorbike was semi-automatic, which meant there was no clutch, but I had to manually choose which of the four gears was best for my situation. Until this incline, I casually rode around in 4th gear handling everything comfortably. On this incline, while in 4th gear, the bike slowed down, trying to climb the slope. So I shifted down into third gear and found that I could not pick up speed, but I maintained a gradual pace. Finally getting to the top, we were just below the cloud cover. You could not see the top of any mountains but could see down into the valley that we had just ridden through and see that the town we just traveled through was built along the only road that travels between the mountains. There are very few buildings constructed, not on the street.

As I enjoyed the beauty of the landscape around me, my bladder reluctantly reminded me that he had been patiently waiting for some relief. Even though it was obvious that there was no toilet around, I made the joke to Vàng, saying, “Hey man! You said the toilet is soon.” He laughed and said, “Yes, soon,” then called everyone over to his motorbike, where he laid a map on the seat. I assumed he would show where we started and how far we had traveled and that this would be a regular part of the tour as an entertainment factor. As I passively listened, other motorbike riders passed behind us. I would try to get excellent pictures or videos of them. After a few minutes of Vàng talking, I’m thinking, man, he has much to say about the last two hours of the trip. Then I heard him say, “On day three,” I looked at another rider and asked, “Did he just say day three?” The other rider confirmed I had heard that. Damn, this man just pulled out a map to break down our entire trip at a random spot on the side of the road?! I knew that there was zero chance I would be able to remember all of the Vietnamese town and village names that were along our route, even if I had been 100% dedicated to the conversation, so I guess, realistically, nothing was gained or lost in my lack of attention.

After Vàng finished the entire trip breakdown, we returned to the motorbikes and headed off. This time I contemplated if I had made the wrong choice by not climbing the hill into the woods to relieve myself. This time we had not made it very far down the road, and the entire group started to slow down. As I begin to get a glimpse of what’s causing everyone to come to a near stop, I see a white and green truck on the left side of the road and a man in a police uniform waving everyone by that has a Vietnamese driver and pointing to all of the foreigners to pull over. Well, here is the real shocker I got stopped. So he walked up to another driver and me in our group and showed a picture of an ID on his phone. Then he pointed to us and then to the photo, and I have to say, even though I understood zero of what he said, I knew I was going to be pulling out my driver’s license. As I reached for my wallet, I began looking for my tour guide to assist with translating and realized that he and the rest of the group had made it a little way down the road before they had pulled over. Now I wonder if the other driver and I are on this part of the trip alone. I handed the license to the cop. He takes it and walks to other drivers behind me from another tour group, I assume, looking for their driver's licenses. I look back down the road for a glimpse of the tour guide to help us out, and I’m still not seeing him. I’m beginning to believe I must escape this situation without help. Now the cop returned to me and wondered where my license was from. I told him the US, and he asked which state. I let him know it was from Texas then he pulled out his phone and started doing some Google searches. I tried to tell him I had an international permit in my bag on the back of the bike, but he couldn’t understand me.

From my experience with cops in America, you don’t do anything that they are not expecting you to do. So I sat there while the cop examined my license and noticed our tour guide finally walking towards us. As Vàng approached us, the cop played a Google translator recording to the other driver saying, “This license is not valid.” Then Vàng says, “Do you have your international permit?” I said, “Yes, it’s in my bag.” He tells me to grab it. I handed the permit to the cop while the cop was telling Vàng that the other driver's license was void.

The cop looks at my permit and hands both of my documents back to me, then says I’m good to go. I asked the cop if he had a toilet I could use, which by the look on his face, shocked him. Then Vàng asks me to wait up the road by the others. So I gladly moved down the street, free from the stress of wondering what the outcome would be, but now having to urinate more than ever. With some serious-looking police officers around, I decided against using the bushes. As I joined the group, everyone asked me how I got out. Did I pay my way out, or was I let go? I gave them the run down and told them the cop said the other guy was not valid to drive. Then we sat waiting and speculating on the outcome. We tossed around ideas like maybe they tell him he can’t go and we have to wait for another driver, or perhaps the cops take him to Vietnam jail where he would most likely be released.

After some speculations and a few jokes about the situation, we see the other driver walking towards us, and we immediately think he has to leave the bike there. As the other driver approached us, he asked another guy he was traveling with to borrow 1.5 million dong ($64) for the fine. Then tells us that the cops said if they filed it with the government, it would cost 5 million($213), but if he “filed” it with just them, it would only cost 1.5 million, and it doesn’t go on his record. So as anyone else would do, he gladly chose the 1.5 million to keep it off his record. With the 1.5 million dong in hand, he returned to the cops to pay his fine. Vàng walks back while the foreigner pays his fine, and a few moments later, the other driver returns to the group and gets a little cheer. Then we quickly get out of there to ensure we get out of sight as soon as possible. We continue up the mountain briefly before finally getting to the first stop with a toilet.

We started the drive around 8 am, almost 11 am by now, and we got to our first bathroom break. Through all of the bumps on the road, vibration from the motorbike, and scare from police officers. It was finally time for the most fantastic relief of my life. I used this chance to grab a couple of pictures, and we mostly stood around this mountain-top coffee shop, taking pictures and chatting about our ride and past experiences.

It felt like as soon as the group had left this mountain-top cafe, the sun finally started to come out, and the fog and overcast skies began to clear up. As we made our way down the mountain, we only drove for about 30 minutes before stopping again, but this time you could look back and see where the clouds seemed to be blocked by the mountains, and we were able to get our first pictures of the scenery without the looming gray clouds.

At this sunshine stop, I took this opportunity to get a couple of pictures of me with the tour guides as well as a couple of the guys still laughing about the cop incident. After this break, we take the next turn and see the large town in the valley. We were all thinking about food but had no idea what time we would eat. This town would be it, thankfully. As we get into town, our tour guide pulls into an Italian food restaurant. Most people on the trip weren’t excited, and even the tour guides didn’t eat there. On the flip side, it was part of the tour for us to get one free meal there, and no one would turn down free food. As I looked at the menu, I saw a typo about the milkshakes. It was written Milk Shack. This typo led me to believe when I saw an image of spaghetti that maybe they misspelled it and called it noodles. Typos like this are common in Asia, and it is understandable English is so different from their native language I can’t fault them for just getting close.

So I ordered the “fried noodles with beef,” thinking it would look like the image at the top of the page. The picture looked like spaghetti, and even if I got noodles instead of pasta, I would have been more than satisfied. We all began placing our orders, and the pizzas looked pretty good. Then guys at the far end of the table, I couldn’t see their food, but everyone seemed satisfied. As the meals got closer to my end of the table, a couple of guys had ordered lasagna. Well, it appeared that they were out of lasagna pasta. I don’t have a picture of it, but they got bowls of cheese and lasagna sauce heated up and a piece of garlic toast on the side. I again do not believe that anyone at the table expected an authentic Italian-style lasagna in a small town in northern Vietnam close to the China border. I also don’t think anyone had high expectations for this meal. I do believe whatever their expectations were of others. I believe everyone's expectations were significantly reduced following some of the meals that came out. My “spaghetti” was not a bad translation, and after receiving my meal, I realized that the picture was not a representation of the food on that page but was just a picture of Italian spaghetti. I received a delicious plate of fried noodles with beef chunks.

After lunch, we headed out of town, driving through some rice and corn fields until we reached the mountains roads again and began the twisting turns to climb the mountains. This portion of the drive took about 1 hour before we stopped for our next break.

We rode through the mountains, with some roads getting exceptionally tough, involving sand and gravel patches. The incline of the streets reaches degrees so steep that you have to shift down to 2nd gear to maintain speed. As we rode through the mountains, I couldn’t help but feel as though we would see some Jurassic Park creatures come out of the woods at times. The vastness of the mountains and the ever-green jungle just kept you constantly amazed that people get to see these sights every day. We rode until we reached our next breakpoint. “lonely tree” was appropriately named because it was the only large tree on the side of this mountain.

We only stopped at the lonely tree for a minute and jumped back on the motorbike, where we rode for about 15 minutes before stopping at a person's house where they played club-style music and would, sold drinks, and offered a restroom break.

Wow!!!! I had no idea how much I had to say about just the first day of this trip. I will have to stop here and hit this with part 3.